Dear Michael -

My husband is rarely in the mood anymore. We used to make love about once a week but now it is every two or three months. Its not that he is against it he just says that he's tired. What can I do?

Thanks,
Sherry

Dear Sherry -

There could be a few different issues at play here. His hormones might have dropped significantly which would naturally make sex uninteresting to him. A trip to the doctor could check on that.

Perhaps he is not able to get erections or perform quite like he used to and doesnt want to be embarrassed that he's not the stud he used to be.

You could be wanting sex the wrong time of day. If you are suggesting it at night, try in the morning when a man's sexual peak is (especially if he wakes up with an erection).

You could be doing the wrong things. After all these years sex could be boring to him. Try some new things. If you haven't learned how to give amazing blow jobs then now is the time to begin.

He could be masturbating too much and therefore is "out of juice" when it is time for the two of you to become intimate. If your husband masturbates, that in itself should not be a concern - only when it interferes with the intimacy you two share.

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Comments from readers:

Around the age of 47 I noticed a lack of energy both in the bedroom as well as the gym. My mind had lost its sharpness and I felt like I was sucking air in my workouts. My doctor started me on Androgel, a testosterone supplement applied to my skin once daily.

This has made the world of difference both in my libido as well as muscle tone.

Recently though, I was experiencing a less than desirable erection. After checking my testosterone levels and finding them to be at an acceptable level, I was prescribed Cialis. WOW!!! Rock hard and the climax is like I was 30 again. Using these drugs gives me the confidence that I will maintain the hardness through ejaculation. When we age we lose what once was, and with the help of these new drugs, our confidence in performance can be regained. That in and of itself will increase his desire to be "out there".

Sincerely,

Richard J.

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I found Get Him in the Mood by Kate Dixon to be a great resource. Excellent tips and strategies which I was able to use.  Things have been much better recently.

(click on the title to check it out)